As anyone not living under a rock knows, most of the US (except those lucky bastards in Florida and Cali) are experiencing what meteorologists have been giddy over for a few days…THE POLAR VORTEX (dun dun dunnnn). To sum all the scientific mumbo jumbo up….it’s gonna be wicked cold. Without furter adieu, I present the the 5 best ways to pass the time during this insanity.
1. Reality TV marathons – This might be a no-brainer, but there are so many untapped quality television shows on Netflix just waiting to be viewed by the likes of you. For example, does anyone remember The Workout? It was a show on Bravo about this chick named Jackie who looks a lot like Scarlet Johansson for some reason. She’s a personal trainer who has this insane gym on a roof top in LA. So in addition to hating the characters for living in sunny LA, you can be jealous that they get to workout outside while you’re stuck on the dreadmill or worse yet…doing something On Demand.
2. Knitting – There are plenty of learn to knit videos on YouTube. Spend a few hours perfecting that then make yourself something warm to wear…you’re gonna need it.
3. Post up for the day at the local coffee shop. – Bonus points if you find a place with free refills. Bring a ton of books and your computer and use the time to think up back stories for all of the crazies that wander in and out during the day.
4. Organize your bookshelf in alphabetical order. – This idea stems from the fact I’m staring at my disheveled bookcase while watching Hoarders. I have a sudden urge to organize everything and Lysol everything I can find.
5. Sleep. – With any luck, you’ll end up like Chris Farley (RIP) and just sleep your way through this entire stupid season.